Weddings { Funny wedding readings }
If you go to a wedding, here’s what it means
No one wears trainers and no one wears jeans
Your best new clothes are all that you wear
And everyone in your whole family is there
Even some cousins that you’ve never known
And the grown-ups all say “Oh, how much you have grown!”
So everyone’s sitting in one big room
(except Sally and Richard, the bridge and groom)
Then all of a sudden things quieten down
And music starts playing and people turn round
And really slowly, Sally walks in
And she’s prettier now than she’s ever been.
She’s a bridge and she’s really great looking today
(when normally she looks just kind of okay)
She walks in and stands with her dad for a while
As Richard her boyfriend, awaits in the aisle
His hair is all combed and he’s wearing a tie
And then Sally’s mum starts to sniffle and cry.
And now it comes time for the “get-married” part
The Registrar says that we’re ready to start
So she talks and she talks about serious things
Then their friend Chris steps up holding two rings
He gives one to the groom and the other to the bride
Then his girlfriend, Janaki pulls him aside.
Then Sally and Richard kind of look at each other
And another big sniffle comes from Sally’s mother
And Sally and Richard put on the wedding rings
And they talk and they promise each other some things
They promise that they’ll love each other a lot
And help one another no matter what
And be with each other the rest of their life
Then the Registrar says “Now you are husband and wife”.
Then everyone’s in such a big happy mood
And you go to a party with very much food
Where you dance with some grown-ups and drink some wine
And then do a conga-dance in one long line
‘till Sally and Richard drive off in a car
and everyone’s thinking how happy they are
So we all yell goodbye and throw handfuls of rice
Then the whole thing is over. Weddings are nice.
